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"Reality" TV?

Recently, Pastor Rick challenged our married couple’s ministry, Heirs Together, to find a clip of a modern television show that exhibits wives who reverenced their husbands consistently. When the group couldn’t come up with any modern day shows, we resorted to past shows.

A few people went to the “Cosby Show.” However, after some discussion, we digressed because there were times when Clair was a little feisty and borderline disrespectful to Cliff. So while she was a close contender, she wasn’t always a Wise Wife.

“Leave it to Beaver” came into the equation. Surely, we could find no fault with June, right? Wrong. We soon realized that Mrs. Cleaver didn't disrespect Ward, per se, but the Cleaver household functioned well because Ward was rarely home and when he was, he was dealing with the shenanigans of his two sons. The most consistent thing about June was that she always had breakfast, lunch and dinner ready for her family so that they could hold their discussions. And she wore pretty dresses and pearls so she was “easy on the eyes”.

It’s quite daunting to think that almost all wholesome family shows on television have been replaced with “reality” television. There are shows about the [ex] wives of athletes, shows about little people; shows about weddings; shows about chaotic, out of control brides; shows about rappers and their party lives; shows about what not to wear…shows about the lives of fishermen… and the list goes on and on.

I once read an article about how President Obama does not permit his young daughters, Sasha and Malia, to watch a particular reality television show about a famous family because he doesn’t consider some of the members of the family as proper role models. Like this forbidden show, I am sure that many shows nowadays fall under this “do not watch” list.

Outside of my home, I work in family law. My job is to provide customer service to families who are going through the sometimes difficult process of coming up with parenting plans for their children. Many times, parents come to our office disheveled, upset and confused. I have the responsibility to calm them down, diffusing the tension they are experiencing. Sometimes I do that with a smile. On occasion, it is with a calm voice. At times it is just by listening to their stories without interrupting. Some of my coworkers have commented that I have ‘the patience of Job’ to deal with some of our clients. Yes, when I am at work, I am Tiffany the Top Model.

There are times when Tiffany the Top Model follows me to my house and everyone in the house is laughing and having a wonderful time. My husband is happy. My daughters are giggling and playful.

Then [insert a loud, thunderous boom here], there are times when Tiffany the Tyrant follows me to my house. Unlike Tiffany the Top Model, this Tiffany is short-tempered, snapping at everyone who comes against me. Maybe this is because I have had a challenging day at work. Maybe it is because it’s “that time of the month” or maybe it is because I am simply not in the mood to be cheerful. Whatever the reason is, my family is not happy to see this Tiffany come around so they all walk on eggshells not knowing where one of my bombs will land.

The Bible speaks of hypocrites and warns us against being like them. He describes hypocrites as being one way outwardly and another inwardly.

“Just so, you also outwardly seem to people to be just and upright but inside you are full of pretense and lawlessness and iniquity”

(Matthew 23:28 – Amplified Bible)

I know that today if my life were to be broadcast (and don’t be fooled, our actions are being recording by your Father in Heaven), I probably wouldn’t be too proud of the show – especially if the film crew wanted to visit my house on the days that Tiffany the Tyrant was home.

This “WHOAment” has made me see the importance of being the same at all times. If something bothers me, I need to vent that frustration to God and not to my family. They don’t deserve to be subjected to my ill attitudes – especially if this is not the same attitude that I have at work. (See the Whoament about Fixing Your Face).

Every day, you have an opportunity to be the person that God wants you to be. To get an assessment, ask yourself these questions:

If my life was filmed for the entire world to see, 24 hours a day, what would they see? Would people only watch to check out all the drama? Would it be a show that the entire family could watch together? Would people use clips of my show as examples of different aspects of a model Christian’s life (marriage, parenthood, community)? Would someone want to censor my show because of all the profanity and negativity it displays? Would my Father be glorified?

Although it’s easy to fall into the excuses of “I was having a bad day” or “I didn’t feel like it”. But what if God had bad days or if He “just didn’t feel” like blessing you?




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