From the Mouth of Babes
Usually when I pick up our daughters from school, I make it a point to ask about their day. Not only does this open our waves of communication, it gives them an opportunity to voice any challenges and celebrate the triumphs they've experienced.
One particular day, our youngest got in the car and enthusiastically shared her day:
TC: "How was your --"
Her: (interrupting) "My day was really good because I got to help [my friend]."
TC: "Oh really? How did you help her?"
Her: "Well. She was having problems with [one of her other friends] and I gave her some GOOD advice."
TC: (Impressed.) "What was your advice?"
Her: "Well, she stopped hanging out with her because she said she was being mean. I know they are really good friends, so I told her that she should give her another chance. I asked how she would like it if someone didn't give her a second chance. She said she wouldn't like it. I said, 'well, you shouldn't do that her then.'"
TC: "That was really good advice. What did she say when you told her that?"
Her: "She said that she will give her a second chance, but she doesn't think she will change. I told her she should show her how to be nice and to be the example. If [her friend] sees her being nice, she will act nice, too."
WHOAment!! Give others a second chance! You may require the same one day.
WHOAment!! If you want someone to change, you go first. Lead by example. Show them how to act.
In that moment, I was so Godly proud of our daughter. As she recounted her conversation with her friend, I beamed and smiled. I thanked God because not only is she listening to the Godly wisdom we deposit into her life, she is sharing with her peers. She is shining her light, even when we aren't around. Thank you, Jesus! Great job, Baby!
While I beamed at the fact that our daughter was out there dropping biblical bombs on her friends, God used her as the vessel to drop a WHOAment inside of a WHOAment. I love how He takes a simple WHOAment, makes it complex, and simplifies it again for my consumption.
You see, as parents, we should beam and get excited when our children apply our teachings to their lives. It is a blessing when they serve as good examples for their peers. It's an awesome feeling and so encouraging to know that even when we think they aren't "getting it", they are. Great parenting for the WIN, right?!
As a child of God, I can only imagine how He beams and smiles down on me when I am doing what I see Him do and saying the things I heard Him say! I can imagine how excited He gets when I share His Word and what I've learned. I know He is pleased when I walk in His ways because I reap the rewards of following Him.
The Holy Spirit also reminded me (again!) that our children ARE LISTENING to what we say and they ARE WATCHING what we do! They ARE applying it to their lives.
Wait, Holy Spirit. You said that already. Then He said it again in a still-small voice,"TC. Girl. Honeychild. Daughter. Your children ARE listening to what you say and they ARE watching what you do. They ARE applying it to their lives."
Uh oh. Now, I get it.
Talk about a swift kick in my hine parts.
As a parent, when I look at our children, I can see so much of me in them. Like how one may express her thoughts with certain facial expressions. Or how another may smile when she is nervous or feeling uneasy. Or the long pause one may give as she tries to formulate a coherent answer to your question. But there are times when I scold them when they are acting... JUST. LIKE. ME.
There are times when I get frustrated with our children because of their behavior or actions. Yet, if I am being honest, some of the things they are doing stem from something they've seen or heard me do. I can try to justify it by saying "I am the adult. I do what I want to do. They are children. They should know better."
The advice our daughter shared with her friend is so relevant because it applies to me as well: If I want our children to behave differently, I must lead by example, first. For those times they stray from what I've shown them to do, I must forgive and allow them additional opportunities to change.
As a result of this WHOAment, I must be mindful that what I say and do is being taken in and digested by other people, especially my children -- who God entrusted me to guide, nurture and mold.
The point of this WHOAment is twofold: First, even when we don't think so, our children are listening to and watching us. And they are applying what they see/hear to their lives. And secondly, even when we don't think so, our children are listening to and watching us. And they are applying what they see/hear to their lives.
Will they demonstrate our positive influences? Or...?
Selah!
~TC
If you enjoyed reading this WHOAment, you may also like "Quality Control"
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